How Perfectly Swell Marginally Cool Friday Giveaway!
Five choices, I am only taking the first two requests, don't cry for me French
Guiana, etc.
a) An empty box that has written on the outside, "WARNING: VOLATILE AIR MOLECULES ENCLOSED."
b) The name of the upcoming winner of "Survivor: Pearl Islands" on a piece of paper, to be sent by this coming Wednesday. If I am wrong and the name of the future winner is not on this piece of paper, I will pay you $200. I am completely serious about the $200. (I will not pay you $200 if I am late, although I promise I will make a good-faith effort to get this giveaway out on time.)
c) A sucky black 900 Mhz cordless phone that has never worked particularly well.
d) Two bathroom faucets that are in fine working order but that neither Kim or I particularly likes so we are replacing them this weekend. (Note: This is contingent on me successfully putting in the two replacement faucets we have bought.)
e) The entire contents of my upper-left-hand desk drawer at work, because no one requested it either of the three previous times and I have it all boxed up and everything.
All requests have been caught up upon, I believe, except Alex's, and his is not because I want to send him a copy of "Eileen" along with his requests.
i sincerely do not know what you are doing here. are you lost? were you
looking for your delicate calico cat, and did you follow her up two flights of stairs
to this room? she is not here. she was here, yes. we gave her a warm bowl of milk, we talked with her about campaign finance reform for a time, and then she bid us good day. i believe she was
going to the post office two blocks down, but i don't quite recall.
for surely you did
not find your way from prinsiana, the least traveled site on
the internet. if you did, though, perhaps you are looking for humor. perhaps you are looking for profundity. perhaps you are looking for answers.
i'm sorry, but you shall go naught-for-three.
