I will be the next Mike Leigh, no doubt. I am, no kidding, now the proud owner of a digital video camera.
Okay, so I kid a bit. I am the proud owner of a digital video camera, but it (a) only has a resolution of 320x240ish and (b) must be connected to my computer at all times by a USB cord and (c) has no internal microphone (although the software I have does allow simultaneous sound recording if I plug a microphone into my sound card). On the other hand, it cost me less than $4 after I used my $15 Circuit City gift card, so it's all good. And besides, my movie delivery format will be VCDs, which have a resolution of 320x240ish anyway, so it's all good, uh, still. And I've already shot AVI and MPG footage that looks trés cool. Well, okay, kinda cool, maybe, if you squint enough. One bit of footage is even in high-contrast black and white.
So. In two weekends, I will be directing my first film, entitled, "This Is Where the Title of My First Film Will Go After I Come Up With It." It will a five-minute sobering look into the, um, something. Somolia, maybe. Or my mouth. Please help.
Everyone who helps me will be listed in the credits of the film and will receive a VCD1 of the film sent to them upon its completion.
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1 Most DVD players will play VCDs, so if you have a DVD players, it’s all good2.
2 Have you ever started using a phrase or word in conversation sarcastically/ironically/sillily and then realized, months later, that you were starting to use the phrase or word in a non-sarcastically/ironically/sillily manner because of weeks of monotonous, cyclic usage? Yeah. I do that too much.
oh so lovingly written by
Matthew |
i sincerely do not know what you are doing here. are you lost? were you
looking for your delicate calico cat, and did you follow her up two flights of stairs
to this room? she is not here. she was here, yes. we gave her a warm bowl of milk, we talked with her about campaign finance reform for a time, and then she bid us good day. i believe she was
going to the post office two blocks down, but i don't quite recall.
for surely you did
not find your way from prinsiana, the least traveled site on
the internet. if you did, though, perhaps you are looking for humor. perhaps you are looking for profundity. perhaps you are looking for answers.
i'm sorry, but you shall go naught-for-three.
