Matter over mind. For those of us (read: me) who make our double-digit-per-hour salaries lethargically sitting behind computers and attending proactive meetings, it's a bit invigorating to (oh so temporarily) be bringing in moola by using our powerless, powerless muscles. I've spent the vast majority of my time at work today lifting heavy boxes, moving shelves, and unloading and loading a flatbed truck, all while grunting incomprehensible monosyllabic tones and showing my butt crack. (I sincerely hope for the good of the public that the latter characteristic is not true; people would faint from the horror, no doubt.) In short: Today, I am a real man.
Surprisingly, I feel good. Even in today's 92o weather, it was invigorating.1 Have I chosen the wrong station in life? I believe I have. Good bye, useless intellectualism; hello, large biceps!
One question remains: What unskilled physical task should I quit my job for?
[a] sanitation engineer -- have to lift large bags of garbage!
[b] construction worker -- have to lift large power tools!
[c] carpenter -- have to lift large planks of wood!
[d] librarian -- have to lift the latest edition of the O.E.D.2!
[e] professional disc golfer -- have to lift, um, discs.
I'm leaning toward [e], despite the lack of an exclamation mark. But I dunno. This is hard, making such a drastic career change that uses none of the skills that I've learned in my 17 years of schooling. Hmm. Perhaps before doing this, I should go to the University of Richmond and get a Masters in Hard Menial Labor.
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1 Ditto with playing disc golf yesterday with Pablo (beat him by ten strokes, thank goodness) and Von on a day when God had to go to Heaven's Repair Shop to fix that blasted universal air conditioner that's been on the fritz lately and they told him, "Sorry, but we won't be able to get it back to you until September. Hope that's not a problem. It is? Jesus Christ. Take it up with him, I mean. He's the day manager at this joint."
2 Oxford English Dictionary. Yes, yes, I know it’s geniusy for me to call it by its initials. I’m trying -- really trying! -- not to be so smart.
oh so lovingly written by
Matthew |
i sincerely do not know what you are doing here. are you lost? were you
looking for your delicate calico cat, and did you follow her up two flights of stairs
to this room? she is not here. she was here, yes. we gave her a warm bowl of milk, we talked with her about campaign finance reform for a time, and then she bid us good day. i believe she was
going to the post office two blocks down, but i don't quite recall.
for surely you did
not find your way from prinsiana, the least traveled site on
the internet. if you did, though, perhaps you are looking for humor. perhaps you are looking for profundity. perhaps you are looking for answers.
i'm sorry, but you shall go naught-for-three.
