Through the painful and difficult process of elimination, we have reduced the number of potential denominations for me to try out on Sunday to twelve. I will now list them, in approximate order from most conservative to most liberal¹:

Quite conservative:
      Free Will Baptist
      Advent Christian
      Presbyterian, PCA

Conservative to moderate:
      Evangelical Free
      Evangelical Presbyterian

Moderate to liberal:
      Lutheran, ELCA
      United Methodist

Quite liberal:
      Anglican
      Episcopal
      Christian Church (Disciples of Christ)
      American Baptist
      Presbyterian, USA²

Given my dogmatic leanings, we will start with the four in the middle.

United Methodist: Makes no difference what they believe or how close their churches are, as they only have communion on the first Sunday of the month and on Holy Days.

Lutheran, ELCA³: Seven in the Richmond area, including one about two miles from our house and a couple more within 15 or 20 minutes. Potentially iffy on communion on this particular Sunday, although the "couple" church does have weekly communion at the (ugh) 8:15A service. Ed and Beth-Annie's current denomination, so I can commiserate. The most theologically and socially liberal of the three remaining, for better or worse.

Evangelical Presbyterian: Didn't realize there was a middle ground between USA and PCA until doing this little survey, so it obviously isn't a large denomination. One church in the Richmond area, about a 20-minute drive away (although, if I would attend on a regularish basis, it would almost certainly be closer to any potential new house). "We sing a variety of songs, most of which come from current Christian praise and worship sources as well as contemporary arrangements of traditional hymns," which I'm not thrilled about (although I could certainly handle it for one Sunday). Children's ministry director's favorite TV show is "The West Wing," which is a plus.

E-Free: Kind of a strange denomination, in practice: As Ed wrote yesterday, they're relatively non-dogmatic, which means they should line up more closely with other, liberal non-dogmatic bodies like United Church of Christ and CC(DoC). However, not only are they in the NAE rather than the NCC, but I am aware of some E-Free churches that teach the Jack Chick gospel of anti-Catholicism. So I dunno. Depends on the specific church⁴, I suppose, and the specific church in this case (again, about a twenty-minute drive) is Christ Community Church, which has "[p]ractical 'no-nap' messages from the Bible," and claims, "You will find our upbeat blend of Hymns and Contemporary Choruses a refreshing way to start your week off right!" "I should not judge churches based on their websites," he tells himself.

Anyway, pick one for me so I don't have to.

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1 This categorization is based on (a) the beliefs of that denomination that I could find (if any); (b) perceptions of the liberalness or conservativity of the denominations by people more knowledgable than I; (c) the denomination's membership in either the National Council of Churches (more liberal) or National Association of Evangelicals (more conservative); and (d) my whimsy.

2 Yesterday, I surmised that the Presbyterian, USA was more conservative than CC(DoC). I now take back that supposition.

3 Which is redundant, I know.

4 Speaking of specific churches, I am going to assume that the Ames E-Free⁵ is relatively prominent is because the denomination half-started ten miles away in Boone. Ah ha.

5 Speaking of the Ames E-Free, a quick perusal of the website turned up that one of my high-school chums, Jen Lathrop, either is or recently was in North Africa doing missions work (see April 14th). Très bon, Jenny; très, très bon. But no thanks on involuntarily making me feel guilty for doing so little for The Church At Large.