The Goliath Beetle
Atop the stuffing,
it tried to flee the coming
of a fly swatter.
Honorable Mention
What Chlöe knows about Charles Freer
In 1904,
he left a bunch of art to
the Smithsonian.
---
Pardon Me!
Green-bean casserole,
Rolls, candied sweet potatoes.
Recipe for *burp*.
---
Why I am spending the next thanksgiving in Hawaii
If I don’t have snow,
I at least want to have warmth.
This haiku is dumb.
Other Notable Haikus
preacher mark is whispering in chlöe’s ear
“i love you more than
jesus loved his disciples.
so ditch your husband.”
---
I was never more happy than the day I broke up with Chlöe
She’s a cruel girl.
I told her off in English.
I hope Jen noticed.
---
Why I cry
I do not know why.
It may be because I lie.
I should ask Chlöi.
---
Not all are Thankful
Thanksgiving is great
For most everyone except
The poor cranberry.
---
Not all are Thankful II
Thanksgiving is great
For most everyone except
The sweet potato.
---
A list of items that I may or may not have eaten for Thanksgiving
Letterhead. Turkey.
Pumpkin pie. A soap dish. Silk.
Gravy. This haiku.
---
What I received in the mail on Thanksgiving
Nothing. Not an item.
The absence of everything.
Nada. Zilch. Zippo.
---
Chlöe and her fab, psychedelic VW bus
She loved that bus, and
she was sad when she traded
it for an Accord.
---
Oh “E,” Chlöe!
Those socialists who
believe the best vowel is “A,”
they should be silenced.
---
of course teddy bears have hearts, chlöe
listen carefully,
and you can hear the soft swish
of blood within fur.
---
Jeremy
Chlöe deserves more:
that big jerk Jeremy only
weighs 100 pounds.
---
For what I give thanks
Thanks for my family,
my home, my job, my puppy,
my sexual peak.
---
Chlöe’s sadness
I could never look
in his eyes: the eyes of a
man wed to another.
---
Ghost World
There was no one named
Chlöe in Ghost World, but there
was a Rebecca.