4-26-2001 Winner

[clap.] [clap.] [clap]-R-O.

E-normous exchange.
U R my legal tender.
O, how I love you.

Dopey McWilliams


Honorable Mention

Great Britain v. Germany

Great Britain thinks the
Euro only slightly worse
Than German hoof-mouth.

Alex Klages

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Mr. Plum's Theory

It was Mrs. White
in the conservatory
with a jackhammer.

Dopey McWilliams

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earth swallowed by a plum

two phyla are dead.
sadly, the earth’s blameworthy.
earth slumps. the plum eats.

hélène françoise lipogramme


Other Notable Haikus

Christmas Pie

Little Jack Horner
said, "Mewwy Chwishmash!" then turned
and spat out the pit.

Sknapper

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a haiku that neither rhymes nor makes contestual thematic sense because its author refuses to change the final word

my brother's a bum
who chews on stolen gum and
eats a stolen grape.

thelma dawn esprit

---

Eurocentric

I am the Euro.
I am stylish. I am rich.
I am rather flat.

Pam R. Whittens

---

The Euro
Powerful unit
Of foreign currency which
Is yet quite unknown.

Alex Klages

---

my date with euro

he was strong, but sweet.
he gave me a slight shiver
when he touched my arm.

thelma dawn esprit

---

EuroAngst

A shared currency
Threatening their sovereignty,
The Windsors demur.

Steve Griffin

---

Plums.

Plums do not care for
The Euro; they dislike the
British and Germans.

Alex Klages

---

Savoring

Plums are succulent.
Euros are arid, tasteless
and rather pricey.

Pam R. Whittens

---

Zeuro’s Zlums
Zi zan’t zay za zing
Zithzout zuttzing zit zezore
Zevzery zyllzazle.

Dopey McWilliams

---

Germany replies
On the other hand
Germany thinks Great Britain
Is Euro-sulky.

Alex Klages

---

my trip to the plum factory
gears spin dark fluid
into perfect purple spheres
inside hollow shells.

thelma dawn esprit

---

No Euros, no plums
Steel casts cover hearts
that yearn and yearn for sweet glee
in the countryside.

Pam R. Whittens

---

naked and alone in a small park north of leningrad
the plum tree shades me.
near is mother’s return with
bottle and teddy.

thelma dawn esprit

---

The UK’s bête-noir
I get national pride,
But I still can’t follow why
Britain hates the plum.

Dopey McWilliams

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the plum: a musical interlude

i enjoy playing
one beloved piece on the plum:
john’s 4'33".

thelma dawn esprit